Gagging during sex – Why is he doing this to me?

By Dr. Dorothea Flogger
Estimated reading time: 9 minutes


The glorious game of power and submission

Not quite harmless – squeezing air while fucking: Gagging during sex is one of the more unusual sex practices, but it is nevertheless used and endured by many people to increase pleasure.

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Gagging during sex – What is it about?

The sex practice is used in the BDSM scene, especially when a dominant man has sex with a submissive woman. He demonstrates his power over her by strangling her during sex. By cutting off her air supply, he literally holds her life in his hands. It excites her immensely to be helplessly at his mercy and completely at his mercy. By gagging during sex both feel the pleasure much more intense.

How dangerous is this sexual game really?

The sex practice is generally very dangerous. Even if the air supply is cut off for only a short time, permanent brain damage can occur or a stroke can be triggered, for example. If the air supply is interrupted for more than three to four minutes, death may even occur.

Gagging during sex - Why is he doing this to me?

Of course, this should not happen by choking during sex. In order for choking to increase pleasure and minimize danger, it is better for the couple to address the issue together beforehand. Most importantly, both want the gagging during sex and talk about it in a relaxed atmosphere. In case of health problems (high blood pressure, arteriosclerosis and other cardiovascular diseases) it is better to ask a doctor beforehand if the risk is justifiable.

Proper gagging during sex

It is recommended to proceed cautiously. In general, the air supply may only be interrupted for a few seconds. As an indispensable safety measure, both must agree on a stop signal beforehand. If it is given, the choking must be stopped immediately. Appropriate signals are, for example, when she grips his wrist firmly or taps him on the shoulder. In any case, it must be possible to give the stop signal even if she is unable to speak.

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Gagging during sex should only be done on the sides of the neck. On the front sits the larynx, a very sensitive organ. His fingers have no business there.

If strangulation marks remain or if pain is caused by strangulation during sex, a doctor should be consulted as soon as possible.

When the air escapes during sex – this is what you should watch out for

Use wow effects without danger!

Gagging during sex - Why is he doing this to me?Gagging during sex alone does not lead to great lovemaking. Sexual dominance lives from a versatile staging. An accentuated alternation between gentle stroking and hard grabbing has a particularly arousing effect. You can support this crackling in various ways. You don’t have to completely deflate a woman to evoke an erotic thrill. The grip of a firm hand to one side of the neck has an effect on many women. It is much less dangerous than choking during sex.

Alternate gagging with head in pillow

Even a normal pillow can be well incorporated into the love game. When her breathing quickens, he can reach into her hair with a firm hand and press her head into the pillow. Unlike gagging during sex, this does not cause any gag marks. The soft cushion is much more comfortable than the grip on your own neck. And yet it gives great gestures of domination. When you then see the pillow in everyday life and think back to the moment, it further enlivens your imagination.

So much has a collar

Strangulation during sex is typically characterized by firm control and a grip on the throat. If you want to serve exactly this fetish, you will also find a great equipment for the bedroom in a collar. The BDSM scene gives a lot of beautiful collars. They serve their purpose and are safe at the same time. After all, a collar does not tighten. With the right collar, he can safely put them on a leash.

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The collar controls and directs her neck even better than choking during sex. Indeed, it can remain on the neck throughout. In the process, collars open up the space for more great role-playing. When the first leather necklace hangs in the bedroom closet, other erotic accessories often follow. And some women have worn parts of their necklace on certain occasions even in everyday life.

Here is what to look for when using belts

If you want to try your hand at BDSM lovemaking and are into choking, you should know one thing. A belt is not a collar. When making love with belts, special care should be taken. In fact, unlike the collar, a belt can tighten and cut off the air in the long term. When that happens, significant hazards occur. Therefore, belts should be pulled around the neck only half. If he’s into belts and they both like it rough, spanking might be an option.

Sexual choking games - Why is he doing this to me?

You can try a lot of things during sex. However, you should know what equipment you are using for what. Some BDSM toys that make a violent impression on the inexperienced are very much concerned with safety. The improper use of things from the normal household, on the other hand, can pose significant dangers.

How to choose the right moment for gagging during sex

The right moment plays a crucial role in strangle sex. For one thing, safety depends on it. Finally, choking during sex should only ever take place when the partner can give the stop signal at any time. Therefore, those who have little experience with this love game should definitely not choke in moments of helplessness. On the other hand, choking at the appropriate time can also promise a special fun.

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Some people appreciate it when the oxygen supply is interrupted for a small second just before climax. This interruption can delay the orgasm. The result is increased pleasure. However, since you are not completely in control of yourself in such moments, safety comes first here.

How to ensure safety

Some couples first get a third person to join them in new BDSM practices for safety. The latter is not involved in the action and can intervene if it becomes really dangerous. People with training as paramedics or a career field in the medical field are particularly suited for this. Of course, in this case, you should look for a trustworthy, open and unprejudiced person. With this one discusses before sex what is allowed and what is taboo.

Sexual choking games - Why is he doing this to me?

If the right person is found for it, such an experience can even have a special charm. After all, in this case you share a common dirty secret and experience not only choking during sex. Once the first attempts have passed, the accompaniment is no longer absolutely necessary. You then know each other a little better and know what limits need to be observed.

How to position yourself before gagging during sex

Not every position is equally well suited for strangle sex. It is therefore very important to put yourself in a suitable position. On the one hand, this should give the subjected side sufficient room to maneuver for the stop signal. Depending on what stop signal has been agreed, it is therefore essential to keep one hand free. A verbal safeword is insufficient in the case. This is because when the air is squeezed out, it permanently interrupts speech. While the hand is on the neck, the whole body should not be on the subjected at the same time. This should still have the possibility to make itself felt by its body tension.

What the dominant side should pay attention to

On the other hand, the dominant side should also take the correct position. A lot of responsibility lies with this one. Accordingly, it should be able to react quickly and specifically at any moment. For example, missionary position, sex while standing, or some types of oral sex can be combined with gagging during sex.

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However, there is no general recommendation here. After all, different people arrange different stop signals and move quite differently. Each pair must therefore find out for themselves in which position choking games can be implemented safely and effectively.

Approach carefully and get to know each other

Gagging during sex is a matter of practice. It is best to approach this practice step by step. On the one hand, this allows for safe lovemaking. On the other hand, you get to know your partner better. If you read your partner’s body signals correctly, you will find out the best time for choking or similar dominant practices.

However, we only get to know these signals in more detail over time. The desire for dominant practices forces us to pay extra attention to these signals. Thus, BDSM can lead the partners on a path where they get to know each other erotically intense. This undoubtedly contributes to the popularity of these love practices.

Roleplay and reality are two different things

If he is into choking during sex, you should realize together that it is just a role play. This love practice can be fun – if both partners choose it and want to try their hand at it. Submission, however, presupposes this common consensus. By the way, the fact that hard sex is just a game also has its advantages. In the game you can always reinvent yourself. This means that both partners are not committed to one thing.

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Erotic tingling lives from variety and from the fact that secret fantasies are lived out. When living out these fantasies, you also get to know yourself again and again from new sides. Sometimes gagging during sex can bring up such new sides. There is nothing against living out these sides as well. You just have to read up on it a little bit.

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