Buyer of a cucumber mistaken for a vegan

By Jens Haberlein
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes
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Logical, isn’t it? Vegan – Cucumber – Sex

Forgetfulness can lead to misunderstandings. This is what happened recently to a woman who bought a beautiful, large cucumber. However, she forgot the lubricant in the same breath and so the vegetables were left all alone on the conveyor belt. Of course, the sales clerk and all the other customers present mistook the young slut for a vegan.


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Thought to be a vegan and thus branded forever?

Buyer of a cucumber mistaken for a vegan
Buyer of a cucumber mistaken for a vegan

The smiling salesman blathered on about mustard, healthy living and gluten intolerance. The poor woman tried to put things right on the spot, but it was too late. All assurances that the cucumber would soon find its way into her pussy were in vain. But it got worse: not only did the sales clerk think she was vegan, but so did the other customers in the store.

Acquaintances, neighbors and people with small children watched the event. How long would it take for the first rumors to make the rounds? Being labeled a vegan is no fun. Every bitch has a bad reputation to lose. Too much good behavior can be extremely harmful.

Immediate measures

The poor woman realized what a mess she was in and reacted immediately. She turned to the press, which she hoped would give her the best support. These were Eronite, the Guardian and the New York Times. Our editorial team was even offered the opportunity to record a masturbation video with said cucumber and publish it free of charge. This shows how desperate the girls are when it comes to their bad reputation. Being mistaken for a vegan as an amateur slut is a damn serious thing.

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In order to protect the poor girl’s privacy, we have refrained from publishing the video. We ask for your understanding at this point.

A dropout confesses: curiosity was the beginning

The seriousness of the situation becomes clear when one listens to the report of a dropout. It goes without saying that the girl wants to remain unrecognized. In her unsparing confession, she tells of an initial misunderstanding: as an amateur girl, she was always on the lookout for new dirty tricks and had mistaken “vegan” for another word for “vagina”. She researched the topic and soon had so-called friends who wanted to drag her down into the vegan milieu and sign her up for the Fuck For Forest campaign.

Reading tip for you from EroniteRead also:
This vegan only sucks meatless cock
PETA calls for sex ban for meat-eating men
Confirmed: Eat more fruit for better oral sex!
Interview with the curvy amateur Lina Mila
Veganessa porn: Small tits and a greedy mouth

You can hardly get out of a situation like this on your own. But there are ways and means of getting professional help. For example, those affected can report anonymously to the nearest juvenile detention center (juvenile vegan dropouts). Various butchers have also already set up an emergency number where you can order meat 24 hours a day. If someone is mistaken for a vegan on the street, they are given a sticker with this telephone number. The danger of the vegan crash cannot be taken seriously enough.

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