Asexual – but she wants sex and not flowers!

By Mario Meyer -
Estimated reading time: 6 minutes
Asexual - but she wants sex and not flowers!

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She wants sex – He gives flowers

I’m asexual, why?

This situation is very unusual. Most of the time it’s the other way around. The man annoys his partner: “I want sex!” But she is not interested and would rather have her peace and quiet. But if she keeps begging him “I want sex,” he could be asexual.

Asexual - but she wants sex and not flowers!What does asexual mean?

Asexuality is regarded by science as a sexual orientation, just like heterosexuality or homosexuality. Strictly speaking, asexual means lack of sexual desire. Not to be confused with frigidity, where sexual desire is present but little or no pleasure is felt during the actual act. People with this sexual orientation of the asexual person have no interest in sex or sexual acts, neither with partners of their own nor with those of the opposite sex. As a rule masturbate Asexuals also do not. And if they do, it’s not for the pleasure of it.

I want sex, not flowers!

Can an asexual man comply with this request of his partner? Surprisingly, yes. The fact that a man is asexual in no way means that he is incapable of sexual acts. He’s just not interested. This does not mean, however, that his penis cannot become hard if he is cleverly stimulated by his partner.

Now and then asexual men even masturbate. However, this does not happen to create pleasure for oneself, but rather to relieve the tension. Therefore, he is physically quite capable of responding to the call “I want sex!”.

Can asexual men feel love?

Yeah, that’s no problem for most people. You can have a normal partnership, just like other men. In some respects they are even better than ordinary men. They know, of course, that their partner expects sex from them, but they cannot fulfil these expectations, or at least not fully. They often make an effort at the beginning of a relationship and are there when the woman whispers in her ear: “Honey, I want sex!”. This is done to emotionally bind the partner to herself and to strengthen the relationship. Even later it does not mean that the partner has to give up sex if her boyfriend or husband is asexual. Both can even do it often and wildly with each other, for example to fulfil a desire to have children.

The asexual man – a dream partner?

Outsiders can quickly get this impression because men who are asexual combine their lack of interest in sex with special attention and proof of love. They are polite and courteous, take loving care of their wife, bring her flowers and small gifts and never forget their wedding day. In short, a dream partner, if it weren’t for the sex thing!

How many men are asexual?

There are no reliable figures on this because no scientific studies have yet been carried out on this subject. In a study conducted in 1994, two percent of all respondents said they had never had sex in their lives. The researchers suspect that a large proportion of these men are asexual. Consequently, asexuality is quite rare.

Die Erektion vor Angst • Orgasmus kurz vor dem TodWhy is there hardly any reliable information?

The reason is that asexuality is still a topic that is not discussed in public. A man who is asexual, i.e. has no interest in sex, contradicts the image of men in society. Men are expected to be daredevils and machos, always ready for sexual adventure. Men boast in front of friends, work colleagues and at the regulars’ table about how many women they have had sex with or proudly show photos of their latest conquests (especially if she is considerably younger than him and looks very attractive).

Mein erstes Mal käuflicher Sex mit einer Hure

Sometimes good friends or work colleagues even go to the whorehouse together and really let it rip. No asexual man fits into this idea of manhood. If he openly admitted to being asexual and not having a interest in sex, he would most likely be laughed at and ridiculed by his comrades. An open commitment to asexuality could be the trigger for a bullying campaign. That is why most of those affected conceal the fact that they are asexual. They often do not even confide in their partner, or only when the relationship threatens to fail due to the problem.

Even women whose partner is asexual often remain silent about their problems to outsiders. This is because many women blame themselves when their partner no longer desires them sexually. Only a few are jealous and suspect that their partner has a lover. Many women think they are no longer attractive enough, do not dress sexy or have become too fat. They do not even suspect that their boyfriend or husband could be asexual.

Can a relationship with an asexual man work?

It depends on both partners and how well they get along with each other. One thing is clear, the constantly repeated demand “I want sex!” does not solve the problem, but only contributes to increasing the tension. Also asexual partners do not like to live alone. They long for a woman who understands them and with whom they can share their life. However, sex plays no or only an unimportant role. They are more likely to express their love with tenderness, compliments or loving care for the girlfriend or wife.

This can work, if she doesn’t constantly insist on “I want sex!” There are also women whose sexual desire is not as strong. They can handle it if their husband is asexual.

I want sex – what if she needs lots of sex?

If the love between the two is not so strong, it would probably be best to end the relationship. Otherwise there is a risk of emotional damage or even domestic violence.
If both love is strong and they are tolerant, a open relationship would be a possible way out of the dilemma. Although she loves her husband with all her heart, she gets her sexual satisfaction from others. This could be an open relationship, for example, or she could possibly work as a hobby whore or camgirl and in this way satisfy her lust.

Is there a cure if a man is asexual?

No, that’s not possible. Asexuality is not a disease but a sexual orientation. It’s no good if she keeps saying, “I want sex.” Even potency drugs are ineffective because they can only promote erection, but cannot produce pleasure. Nor is it of any use if she presents herself to him in lingerie or otherwise tries to sexually tease him. If the partner is asexual, no therapy will help. Basically there are only 2 possibilities: either she learns to accept it or she ends the relationship.

Was tun? Mein Mann hat keine Lust auf Sex!

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